I was cleared to use one crutch when I’m moving around my house. Woohoo to milestones! That was seriously big news! So for the rest of the day Tuesday, I used one crutch around my house. I was so excited to be able to move my water cup from room to room and carry a cup of tea to my recliner. I even made dinner for the first time in months! I was so proud of myself and so excited for Chris to come home to dinner being ready. I could actually help out for once around the house. I even got to feed Lucy and in her actual dish this time!

Smash cut to Wednesday and holy pain! Every step I took hurt so bad. It was such awful pain that I tried to walk as little as possible. The whole day was spent in bed and it was my only day in a week and a half without visitors. I guess that timing worked out well. Lots of sleeping and watching tv again. I didn’t do any of my PT exercises and felt a bit guilty about it, but I knew I needed to listen to my body. As far as my neck, in PT I had a flare up of pain and muscle spasms. My therapist was able to calm most of it down before I left, but it makes me so nervous that it could get worse. So I was also babying my neck and taking a day off of those exercises too. It’s a little like PTSD when I feel that neck pain come back. I start protecting and guarding the area and just pray that I don’t get the headaches and nerve pain again. This time I felt like it was a cheat of death, somehow those symptoms didn’t come on and maybe that’s because surgery actually fixed the issues in my neck. It’s just so hard to trust my body and the recovery process. I am thankful that I have learned how to listen to my body. I no longer am going to ignore symptoms and when I need a low key day to settle and rest my body, I will do just that and that was my Wednesday.

I still hurt quite a bit today (Thursday), but thankfully I had a PT appointment for my neck and hip. I spent two hours with my therapist and he did all soft tissue work. Everything around my hip, glute and thigh were flared up and angry. I had ultrasound on my hip and neck and electrical stimulation on my glute/hip area. Lots of heating and icing and massaging. He helped relieve a lot of the back pain and loosened some of the spasms in my trap and neck. Thank goodness! He also helped reassure me that this is normal and just all part of the recovery process. I was feeling pretty bummed and disappointed. I was so excited for the new milestone and then of course BAM I’m knocked on my ass. I was so frustrated until I was talking to my PT and was able to accept that this is minor in the whole picture of the “season” I am in. I am still living with no expectations, so really this is ok. I was not expecting to go successfully to one crutch and never use two again. I’m riding the waves of recovery and life. I use to surf the ocean’s waves, but now I can’t help but think I’m surfing life right now. Kind of a funny little analogy, but I like it and I’m sticking to it!